Sunday, April 8, 2012

My birthing plan.....

Originally wrote in 2010......Mommy war #1.....Birthing plan or not???

Last week I was sitting peacefully by myself,watching my children play at the splash pad. When along comes a lady with a little boy. She sits right next to me, I mean uncomfortably close. I am already bothered with this lady....seriously there were tons of spots to sit and I get her in my lap!!

I could tell this lady was pregnant like she obviously knew that I was. This is where it all began.
This was our conversation....
lets call her Marsha.....

Marsha: "How far along are you?"
Me: 7 months (to be nice, I asked) And you?
Marsha: 5, with another little boy. Do you know what you are having?
Me: This will be my fourth girl.
Marsha: Ohhh, your husband must be so disappointed?

(first off...screw you Marsha)

Me: He doesn't mind.
Marsha: do you have your birth plan written out yet?
Me: Excuse me?
Marsha: You don't have a birth plan?
Me: yes, I plan on having a baby!!!
Marsha: should have one. Me and my husband decided to have no medication, When I get to the hospital I want to sit on a birthing ball to help calm me. We are going to have Josh Groban playing in the background, no one but me and my husband,well including the doctors,will be in the room with us.
You should really have a plan.

Good thing (well not really) that Pierce got knocked over by an older kid. I ran up to pick her up and packed up the girls to go home.

ahhh Marsha, Marsha, Marsha.....

First off: My husband doesn't get a choice in whether or not I receive medication or not. Lets be honest,I'm part Mexican.....If I had no medication I'd be sounding like the other ladies down the know the ones without insurance and have the whole family in the waiting room munching on tacos and burritos! Those ladies are screamers, screaming things that I don't even know what they are saying. But it must be funny if my dad is laughing.

Second: Isn't rolling on balls how I got into this mess......

Third: There will be no music in my room. Is this supposed to calm you, cause if so then crank the Eminem or Dr.Dre. That would get me pushing!

Fourth: There is nothing more awesome in the world then to have a child, but to be able to watch someone watch you have a baby....its pretty cool too. I would love to be able to experience someone close to me have a I love returning the favor.

So....maybe that's my plan!

1 comment:

  1. LMAO...BIRTHING PLAN REALLY?? How about Marsha, Hubby, & Groban go back to the alien planet they came from? My plan was get this baby out ASAP, don't touch me, don't try to stare at the baby monitor positioned right behind my head to make me feel like I am being watched. Oh yeah and the only one that is allowed to give me any kind of directions is the DOCTOR.